Chelsea Player Ratings: Noah Match Recap

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Post on Nov 08, 2024

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Chelsea Player Ratings: A Noah's Ark of a Match

Okay, so we all know the Blues had a game against Noah, right? Yeah, it wasn't the most glamorous opponent, but it was a good chance to see how the boys are shaping up. This wasn't your typical Premier League thriller, more like a Noah's Ark of a match - lots of water, some animals, and a bit of a slow pace. But, let's dive into the individual performances and see who floated and who sank.

The Ark's Anchor: Kepa Arrizabalaga

Let's be real, Kepa was the only reason we even had a match report to write. He was absolute dynamite in goal, pulling off some jaw-dropping saves that even the mighty Noah himself would've been impressed by. Seriously, the guy was a brick wall, making sure the scoreline wasn't as bad as the weather. He was the unsung hero of the day, and deserves a big shout-out.

The Flotilla: Mount, Havertz, and Gallagher

These three lads were floating through the game like a pack of ducks on a pond. They were all hustling, working hard, and making good runs but just couldn't quite break through the Noah's Ark-style defense. It was a little frustrating to watch, but they kept trying, so they get a decent score for effort.

The Sinking Ship: Pulisic and Ziyech

Ouch, these guys were struggling. It felt like they were stuck in a whirlpool, just spinning around and around without getting anywhere. Both of them looked off the pace and didn't really seem to connect with the rest of the team. A tough game for them, and hopefully they can bounce back soon.

The Captain: James

The Captain was a solid presence on the pitch. He held the line well and made some key tackles. He wasn't quite his usual dominating self, but he was still a reliable figure for Chelsea.

Overall: A Stormy Sea

This game felt a lot like a stormy sea with some rough patches. Chelsea were clearly trying to navigate the game and find their way forward, but they just couldn't quite get there. It was a frustrating performance for the fans, but a valuable learning experience for the team. Let's hope they can weather the storm and come out stronger in the next match.

Remember: This was just a friendly, and these ratings are purely for entertainment purposes. We'll have a better understanding of where the team is at once the Premier League season kicks off!